Natalie’s Story

What was the challenge around parenting before you did Kids matter?

I believe my son is ADHD and can be very difficult, with very challenging behaviour. It’s difficult to ask him to do anything; getting ready for school etcetera. Mornings were very stressful – he didn’t want to go to school.  

What was the impact of that on you as a parent, and on your children?

There’s a lot of impact. I think for him, it was I was constantly nagging; constantly going on at him, and asking “Can you do this?” over and over. I just felt I was always on at him. I just nagged and nagged at him. And obviously it’s not good because he wasn’t getting any kind of praise out of it. There was no “Well done” or “You did that well.” No positive seemed to come out of it and it used to stress me out for the day. I’m sure it did the same for him.

How would you say things have changed having done Kids Matter?

I think I’m much more positive, maybe a little bit more relaxed. In the mornings, he now walks to school. I think that he really enjoys that and it really pays off, and he likes that independence. I do get him to text me when he’s there so that I know he’s safe but it’s a very different morning now. He’ll take it on himself to get ready. He’ll take it himself to go and get dressed. He’ll say I’ve got to go and have breakfast and get his water ready for his bag and all that sort of stuff. He’ll do it all pretty much on his own now.

How has that impacted your family and home environment?

It’s definitely been more relaxing. It’s definitely been much calmer; easier on everybody

How has being part of a Kids Matter programme helped you in the journey of seeing that change?

In quite a lot of ways; we talked about a lot of things over the course. As I say, I think my son is ADHD so I’ve now managed to get sort of tech meetings in place for him. Walking to school is a big thing for him and I think that really helps him, and me. I also plan to do a managing challenging behaviour course, which would really help with him and his behaviour. And there are lots of other bits and pieces; like the love languages. I’m now able to encourage him rather than to keep grinding on him. Home is more positive. Much more positive.